why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

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Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

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A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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Yo momma's so fat, however, she takes pride in her size because every body is beautiful.

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whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his bike? He didn't have a bike, his family was very poor and did have much money. Therefore a bike for Timmy was the last of their concerns.

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A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

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Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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Racial equality.

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Q: Why did Frank have a big horse named Bubba? A: He was allergic to cats

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Roses are *yanks hair* Violets are *yanks hair* *sobs and yanks hair* I have tricolomania

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

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Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

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what did the african say when he got cancer? what? i don't know, he said it in african.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

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jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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