What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

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Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

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Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm Scizophrenic And so am I.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

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Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

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whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

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Friends are like potatoes, If you eat them, they will die.

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retatrded

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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women's rights

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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