What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Mahjdichdhsjxidjhsbxu shcowiqx own hdqu Hedgehog the third

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Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

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What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

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Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Q:where did the little kid go? A:wait, before or after i killed him

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PIED NINNY!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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