You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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Why did the black man repeatedly punch the white man? The two men were boxers. They were fighting in a charity boxing match. Revenue generated by the event went towards cancer research.

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

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people can be soooo loud!!!!!!! sooo loud that they wake up helen keller!!!!!!

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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what do you call cheese that is not yours? stolen property

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What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

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Whats cold and can't climb trees? Refrigerator

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

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What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

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What was that pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Female Orgasms

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What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

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when i'm away from home i sometimes get love sick, well they call it chlamydiae.

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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what do you call obama a dumbass

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God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

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I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

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Three construction workers are high up on a building when they decide to take their lunch break there. The three open their respective lunches, converse pleasantly, and enjoy the fine weather.

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What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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