THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

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Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

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why did the chicken cross the road, but didnt make it he didnt cross it. he was pushed by a band of gang members and hit by a bus

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Whats the difference between a fish and whale? Ones bigger than the other.

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

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whats worse than a kane nothing

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a chicken An animal cruelty charge

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what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, although depending on how high the light in question is and where it's located she may need someone to help hold a ladder for her, if it's particularly unsteady.

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops