Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

Compton

What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

A Horse walks into a Bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The Horse had cancer.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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