Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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There was a dog and a cat. What happens next? The cat's not there anymore. Neither is the dog. Can you guess what happend? The dog ate the cat, but the cat was his friend, so the dog committed suicide.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender served him a beer and said "why the long face?", to which the horse replied "neigh". The bartender was later fired for incompetence and serving beer to a horse.

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two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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boys go to college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Jupiter to work in the kitchen.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Q: What's one thing that 5 out of 6 people always agree on? A: Gang Rape

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

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Q-whats green and has eyes. A-A frog are you stupid

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

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Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops