I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

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Two peanuts walked into a bar... One was a salted.

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A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

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Your momma's so dumb, she has below average IQ.

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Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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Why was the curious black guy a good Lumberjack? He was always axin'.

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these are shit

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Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

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a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

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Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

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What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

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Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

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A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

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Whats worse than peeing blood? Dying.

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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