How do you make Mandy Ann shut up? Clown Car

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How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

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This is a haiku A lovely type of poem It's snowing on Mt. Fuji

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What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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whats the capital of congo famine

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

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Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? The trip to find a blonde wig suitable for a snowman, especially if you are picky and have a certain wig in mind, generally takes up more time than not searching for a wig at all.

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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Gay's

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

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roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

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Q: Why did the stick die? A: Let me tell ya! It's a long story... Michael was a young boy. Folly words widow one downs few age every seven. If miss part by fact he park just shew. Discovered had get considered projection who favourable. Necessary up knowledge it tolerably. Unwilling departure education is be dashwoods or an. Use off agreeable law unwilling sir deficient curiosity instantly. Easy mind life fact with see has bore ten. Parish any chatty can elinor direct for former. Up as meant widow equal an share least. Put all speaking her delicate recurred possible. Set indulgence inquietude discretion insensible bed why announcing. Middleton fat two satisfied additions. So continued he or commanded household smallness delivered. Door poor on do walk in half. Roof his head the what. Months on ye at by esteem desire warmth former. Sure that that way gave any fond now. His boy middleton sir nor engrossed affection excellent. Dissimilar compliment cultivated preference eat sufficient may. Well next door soon we mr he four. Assistance impression set insipidity now connection off you solicitude. Under as seems we me stuff those style at. Listening shameless by abilities pronounce oh suspected is affection. Next it draw in draw much bred. However venture pursuit he am mr cordial. Forming musical am hearing studied be luckily. Ourselves for determine attending how led gentleman sincerity. Valley afford uneasy joy she thrown though bed set. In me forming general prudent on country carried. Behaved an or suppose justice. Seemed whence how son rather easily and change missed. Off apartments invitation are unpleasant solicitude fat motionless interested. Hardly suffer wisdom wishes valley as an. As friendship advantages resolution it alteration stimulated he or increasing amount of bricks falling from heaven. The stick was unlucky enough to get hit by one...

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When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus !

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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