Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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I was gonna tell a gay joke Butt fuck it.

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"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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Black people having a Job.

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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What's big, white, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.?

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

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why did joe drown ? he had no arms

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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What's a black man's favorite fruit? Clementines.

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What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Trouble with the trolley, eh? No

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a doctor.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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