What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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A boy with red hair is happy.

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What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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minorities

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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