What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

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What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

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So Nero, seriously, don't be mean, call me, I am going to bed now, nighty nite.

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George Bush, a little boy, and his grandfather are on an airplane with a failing engine. They have only two parachutes to save themselves. The plane crashes and they all die.

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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the bible

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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