Opinions are like assholes, neither one can ride a bike, except for the assholes

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Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

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What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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What's better than winning a gold at the paralympic Walking

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

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Well this is pointless.....

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how much will u suck my dick for? $100, $50, $25, o u said none so u give freebees!!!!

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Guy: Hey, you want to dance with me? Girl: Who me? Guy: Nooo that bench over there...

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

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fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

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How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

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My lady, that is the backside of trust, I have decided to trust you, how am I supposed to feel about the fact that I believe to the point where I know that you mean everything you are saying? And that if you had any interest in backstabbing me, I would be risking my life, wife and friends. Do you not get trust? If you keep thinking like that, tomorrow you could be suspecting the mailman for being a spy, I can, and could tell you that I will cut ties with my employees, but then I would have you not only to believe me, but to support me financially, I do not need much, in fact, I need you to trust me, and if you do not trust me, what does it matter if I quit? You could accuse me for typing books that alter the mind (all books do), you could accuse me of having killed Nero and taken over... The point is, if you cannot trust me, then I cannot help you with what you ask, and if that is a requirement for our friendship to persist, then you are not looking for a friend, but for a employee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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