man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why do monkeys fly with their wings? Because Elephants tend to run out of battery.

Whats worse than 4 dead babies in a bucket? finding an actual joke on Anti Joke.

A train poops its pants.

Why did the creeper not go home? Because his parents blew up. (As told by a 7 year old.)

What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

why was the kid crying? because he had to go to school GDS*

¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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