A guy walks into a bar and hears a someone crying. He asks the bartender who is crying and the bartender says "It's my goat. He's been crying since Tuesday, I'm giving a $500 reward to whoever can make him stop." So the man walks to the back and whispers something to the goat's ear and suddenly the goat starts laughing. The bartender was so amazed at what happened and says "Wow, thank you kind sir! Here's your reward money." and the man takes the money and leaves. The next day the man returns to the bar and the bartender says "Hey, ever since you made my goat laugh he hasn't stopped. He's been driving me nuts. I'll give you another $500 to make him stop." So again, the man goes to the back of the bar and whispers to the the goats ear. Suddenly, the goat start crying again. The bartender can't believe it. He asks "How in the world did you do that? What did you say to my goat?" The man says "Well the first time I saw your goat I told him a joke." "Okay, that explains why he kept laughing..." the bartender asks "Now, what did you say to make him cry?" The man replies "I told him..." Suddenly the goat escapes and goes completely crazy and kills everybody in the bar with his horns. Till this day no one knows what the man said to the goat.

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How do you get a woman out of a car? You drive it into a river and her body will float to the top.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

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Wanna hear a joke? Fifa price ranges.....:(

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

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Dislike this joke for a cookie However if you like this joke you dont get a cookie

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If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

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if a fat guy in a red suit comes into your house on christmas. its not santa your about to get raped from chewy(:

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what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

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So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

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What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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