A man looks at a glass and says that it is half full. Another man looks at the glass and says that it is half empty. A feminist looked at the glass and said it was being raped

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

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A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

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Why did the boy jump in the van? Because his parents had just been in a terrible car accident.... There where 2 fatalities.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

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Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

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Argon walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "Get the hell out!" Argon doesn't react.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

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could switching to Geico save you 15% or more on car insurence? Does a bear shit in the woods?

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Q: Why are Dino-Nuggets so good? A: Because they are nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs.

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what did the horse say to the other horse Neigh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

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Roses are shitty Violets are bitches I'm fat.

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What's worse than finding a worm in ur Apple? Finding a worm in ur poop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops