Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

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A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asked "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, as it was a horse and did not speak English nor understand what the man had said, the horse then stumbled around the bar for a while, confused, before finding the exit and leaving.

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was strapped to the first monkey.

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What's fun and challenging? Writing an anti-joke.

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

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Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

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a blond walks in to a post... OUCH

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

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how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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What's the meaning of life? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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