A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the chicken cross the road? WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CARE? LET THE POOR CHICKEN IN PEACE! No, seriously he was going to his mother's funeral.

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

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What comes after 69? mouthwash

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

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Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

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People...

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops