what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

my wife came out of the kitchen....

Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

So Nero, seriously, don't be mean, call me, I am going to bed now, nighty nite.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

George Bush, a little boy, and his grandfather are on an airplane with a failing engine. They have only two parachutes to save themselves. The plane crashes and they all die.

How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

the bible

Women can vote? wtf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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