What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

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Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

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An atheist and a priest agree to a public debate. The priest doesn't make much of an attempt to argue because there is a young boy in his podium giving him a handjob.

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If the black man lives in the black house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The white man. As unfortunate as it is, racism is still a very integral part of society, and the social dominance the white man holds in countries like America are not to be so quickly forgotten.

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How Do You Fart Eat Beans

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a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Depends on the situation. In a formal environment you would call him Mr Dalgleish, in an informal one it would be acceptable to call him Kenny, Kenneth or just Ken.

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Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

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I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

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Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

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What do you get when you cross an orange with a gerbil? A mailbox that lights up when you open it

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Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

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What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

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An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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What did the blind kid that couldn't talk get for Christmas Cancer

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A chicken crossed the road. It was run over before reaching the other side. by fast asleep

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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