Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down

Me: How can you tell if somebody's a Nazi? Friend: How? Me: Their killing people in a ghetto. Friend: My friend was shot in a ghetto. Me: So, does that make him a Jew? Friend: No, he was just killed in a big ass oven.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

thumb_up thumb_down

A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down

A seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

thumb_up thumb_down

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are brown violets are brown who shit on my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

thumb_up thumb_down

What is Yellow and American? A yellow american

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

thumb_up thumb_down

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

thumb_up thumb_down

In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't little Timmy get anything for Christmas? He was an orphan living on the streets.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is wrong with black stereotypes? Nothing! Basketball is pretty fun if you try it!

thumb_up thumb_down

"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops