- Anti Joke

What did the hooker get for Christmas ? AIDS.

Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

What is 33 + 1? Penis

Mitt Romney

So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

whoes considered the best trackstar in the world. the random jamacan who ran onto the field.

What do you call a Mentally Challenged Black Man? Whatever Name his parent(s) Gave him at birth.

Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies nothing child abuse is not a funny matter.

Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

Your mother is so bad at cooking that people often remark on how bad at cooking she is.

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

Well that explains a lot, thank you.

Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

A dog walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "What can I get for you?" The dog replies "1 beer please." shocked at the dogs English the bartender sprints out of the bar in terror

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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