Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

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Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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why would a man mistake a watermelon for AK-47? i dont know. The man probably has mental issues.

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Q: what did i say when i crashed into the twin tower. A: nothing i was dead

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AIDS.

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What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

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Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

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How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

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A blind man walks into a wall.

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A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

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What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

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What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

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My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Voldemort

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Hi

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How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

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Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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