Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

THE GAME.

What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retatrded

How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

Friends are like potatoes, If you eat them, they will die.

Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

Knock Knock who's there docter docter who??? YOU JUST SAID IT DUMBO!!!!!! lolololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol

Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

Nero, please cut the bull, I know you work for the feds, you are involved with the FBI, I know, but its not my problem, I just do not like you lying to me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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