What's brown and adhesive? A stick

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Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

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Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

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How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

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who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

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"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

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If the black man lives in the black house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The white man. As unfortunate as it is, racism is still a very integral part of society, and the social dominance the white man holds in countries like America are not to be so quickly forgotten.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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An atheist and a priest agree to a public debate. The priest doesn't make much of an attempt to argue because there is a young boy in his podium giving him a handjob.

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What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

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how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

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Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

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your momma is so stupid shes fricken retarded

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Depends on the situation. In a formal environment you would call him Mr Dalgleish, in an informal one it would be acceptable to call him Kenny, Kenneth or just Ken.

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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How Do You Fart Eat Beans

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Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops