A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

Laugh

What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

What's 9 + 10 19

Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

Neither have I

Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a girl who was knocked off a swing by a fridge.

Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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