Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Why did the black man perform well? Because he was a well trained musician by the name of Stevie Wonder.

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

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lebron

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Good to see you today!

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What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

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A blind man walks into the door of a bar

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops