how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

24

Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...