Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

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Diarrhea

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

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What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

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Q. Whats black and rhymes with Snoop? A. Dr Dre

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

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sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

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whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

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What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

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I thought we where okay, you seemed so nice and calm before, are you okay? What happened?

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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So what have you overcome? I mean I know alot about you, but little about your personal deeper self, with that said, you telling me you are some kind of X-men when it comes to genetics?

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

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A special needs student walks into a girls change room, and is then escorted out unaware that what he did was socially unacceptable.

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What did the little girl who's parents died in a car accident get you her birthday? Foster Parents

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A duck walks into a bar, but he is kicked out because he is not 21

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Roses are red, Violets are violet,

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3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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