Whats worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding an apple in your worm

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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What is 9 inches long, the same colour as my skin, and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat? Her Miscarriage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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What's red, white, and blue? light purple

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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were you expecting a joke

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Rivals? Someone from the past? Erron, who is "WE"! Tell me now!

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

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my dick is like a bridge. i dont know why.

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What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

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Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

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Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

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You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

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How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

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well now

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whats your budget like? a budget.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops