Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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Yeah i'm into fitness, Fitness whole pizza in my mouth.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

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Cancer.

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What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

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GAWS SI EKOJITNA

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

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When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

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His face was drawn, but the curtains were real.

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A white man walks down an alley and sees two black men. They say hello and then are on their way.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops