a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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How did th-A fridge.

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

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What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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