What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

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Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

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Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

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what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

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Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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