Who's looking for judicial toenail clippings?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

thumb_up thumb_down -23

John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the woman get electricuted? because there was an electric fence around the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the meaning of life? 42

thumb_up thumb_down -23

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

thumb_up thumb_down -23

WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops