why was the man sad? his wife died

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man says to his doctor, "doctor, doctor, I think I have a split personality." The doctor responds, "That makes 4 of us."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. whats worse then eating a slice of cheese? A. Finding out your mom has a penis

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you survive the end of the world? You can't- everyone will die!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the dad say when the irresponsible goth problem child asked for a gun Yes

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A. Why did the man crash the car? B. Because the driver was a blind man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

you dint have to be a jew matt

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse than having no life? having no life and reading internet jokes all day!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A lumberjack wearing women's underwear under his clothes walks into a bar. Several Canadian Mounties stand up and surround him, compliment him on his cooking and offer to go looking for some wild flowers for his herb collection.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops