How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

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Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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How does a black guy die? He doesn't , he's black

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, then they probably won't hear the lumberjack's cries for help either.

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why couldn't the boy use the computer He could i meant could

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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What time is it when you should go to the dentist? About ten minutes before whatever happens to be the time of your appointment.

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You wanna hear a joke? Me too

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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Thanks I guess, I do look a lot like that anime, except my eyes are not giant and I got lips and you know about everything else is different, besides I wear blue or brown contact lenses Ohh, and in case you had not already noticed, I dye my hair brown, believe me, there is enough red in me to go around already... Nero huh? Angelo Nero? So what kind of sick parents did you really have, or do you have? This is weird, you suddenly got even more interesting Nero.

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Well Nero, my actual name is Axel Knight, I might have used your "moralman" identity as my own social experiment of sorts, I mean no offense, and if you will leave some contact information, I am sure we can arrive to some kind of settlement... ...Keep your identity crisis thing, I have absolutely no reason to continue communicating here, besides, its six million followers, actually more like seven...

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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what did the dog say to the retarded black guy ? bark

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops