What did it say on the banner for an international dyslexics support group? Dyslexics of the world unite.

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What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Have you seen Jamal's socks?

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What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

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Q: What did the terrorist do when he walked into the football stadium? A: Set off a bomb, killing him and others there

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What did the zombie eat for breakfast? You. You fell a-sleep

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What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

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Colon Right Parentheses For all of the confused people out there that's :)

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HITLER IS SO SEXY I WOULD PAY A MILLION DOLLARS TO HAVE SEX WITH HIS DEAD HOT BODY WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT HIM I SPRAY MY SEMEN ALL OVER MY JEWISH SLAVES YUMMY HITLER JUST MAKES ME WANT TO BITE HIS ROTTING PENIS OFF AND FORCE IT IN THE EYE SOCKET OF A JEWISH PERSON AND THEN I CUM IN HIS EYESOCKET

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

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why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

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Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

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Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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why does my ass hurt? you have rectal cancer

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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Nick Cannon

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops