Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

Why did Piglet look in the toilet? He was probably fascinated by the flush.

Julian Ha.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What'll it be?" The duck says that he should get his doctor on the phone because his hullucinations are getting worse.

What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender immediately shoots it in the face with a double barrel shotgun, ending the rabid animal's life

Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs? We're going to have to amputate it to prevent infection, you won't be able to walk again.

-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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