Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that if she sat on me, she would crush my skull and kill me.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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A car walks into a bar.

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What did the children say when the magician pulled a rabbit out of his hat? Nothing, but the parents called Animal Control, and the magician was imprisoned after a dog-fighting ring was discovered in Michael Vick's estate.

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No?

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Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

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Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

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What do you get when you mix C4 with a lit- KABOOM!!!

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That awkward moment when you wonder why this person keeps stepping on you, and you realize that you’re a shoe.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John, your son. Now open the door.

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The Irishman walked out of the bad.. Haha just kidding

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A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

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Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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Type better antijokes above

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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