Ben Affleck

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I obviusly meant: Have you ever seen a cow chasing boots? Because the one with the cowboy chasing boots doesn't make sense...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wow, I screwed up, Give me head.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops