What do you call a clock that has no sense of time? .....Broken.

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Dear Diary, I am down to my last drops of water, I'm going to die soon. Wait, a man is offering me some water! Theres still hope, wait he said sike and ran off. I'm going to die alone.

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You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the little boy ask for for Christmas? A new brain, as he has a malignant tumor, he died.

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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Chuck Norris doesnt need air to live, Air needs chuck Norris to live. Actaully that statment is a fallacy because it would be fatal to not breathe

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A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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PSP... Is a cat... you can throw against the wall.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy im black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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