Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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What is the difference between a woman and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is the most common term for adult females of the human race.

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Hi! This is Ms.McGruder you two boys in my office at 3:00 p.m. today

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An anti-joke

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the bible

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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so the weather's nice...

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? Because the Joker was raping Robin too hard!

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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