Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who shit in my garden

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Ring around the rosy. A pocket full of posies. Ashes. Ashes. I just set a dead baby on fire.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

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Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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Brother Bro-ther Broad her Soap

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

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You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the American family left the McDonald's with freshly bought chicken nuggets in their possession, and needed to cross the road to return to their home and eat said chicken.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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who has a vagina, likes men , soundslike afive year old girl, has some sweet boobies and onlyhas one hair on his little vag? Robert sweeny

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Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

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What smells like satans pubic hair and dresses like a woman? Vinny Trolia

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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8 muslims walk into a bar You know why. Because their suicidal bombing plans were put off until Tuesday

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A man says to another man, "Why the long face?" He then replies, "I have an elongated face, hands, and feet due to acromegaly."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops