What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? Obama is the president and a drug-dealer has lost his life to the awful streets.

Why did the n i g g e r steal money? because he was black! and wanted a KFC thanksgiving! :)

Why did the boy drop his vannlai ice cream?because Vannlia ice came.

teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

A ginger kid and his 5 friends walk into a bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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