If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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what did the african say when he got cancer? what? i don't know, he said it in african.

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A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

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Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

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What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

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why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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what is awesome but stupid at the same time? school i lied about the awesome part :p

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Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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If gluttony is a serious sin, why are so many Christians fat? Because they have bad eating habits.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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What is the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? A dolphin is not a ghost

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What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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