Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

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wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Q:What's the difference between a Boy scout and a Jew? A:Boy scouts come back from camp.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

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why couldnt jimmys feet touch the ground? he was hanging.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

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A.act like u see a banner and say hey do you see that banner over there? B.no what are u talking about A.oh well there's a banner over there

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A preschool teacher told his class to draw a squirrel. One child proceeds to break into tears. The teacher says "what's wrong Johnny?" Johnny said "my whole family was slaughtered by a gang of squirrels!" this upset the teacher

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Question: You are in a bed between a hot chick and a gay guy, who do you turn your back to? Answer: False, I am to unattractive to find myself in bed with anybody else.

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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