Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

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Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

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What do you call a man who has lost both his legs, one arm, and half his eye? Larry

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25

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

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What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

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Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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tim has no humor

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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