- Anti Joke

A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

LeBron James proposes. So what does he put on the girls finger? Ben L.

why did the physics major drop out of college? because he stumbled onto a finding that made him contemplate life so much that he needed to go to africa to study where the source of the finding where he later caught AIDS from an infected village person, he was later flown back to the US where he was cured out of a miracle but later hanged himself because he was not allowed to go back to africa and find out the meaning of life.

My two friends Larry and Paul are both race horses. They were getting ready for a big race to quolify them for the Kentucky durby. BANG! The race started! What. Close race! First it was Larry then Paul then Larry then Paul! And finally Larry came out and won it! Paul went to the winners circle and congratulated Larry. He said "hey great job Larry but next time after you come back from touring will you let me win?" Larry says "oh! Of course this couldn't get between us! We're like two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket. We're best friends"... So when he came back from touring Larry said it was great! And promised let Paul win. BANG the race started! It was Paul then Larry then Paul then Larry won again. Paul was a little mad that he he didn't win but he went to congratulate larry anyway. Larry said next time he was deffinetly going to let Paul win, because he wasn't gonna let this get between them because they are two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket, they are best friends. Then after Larry came back from touring he promised again he would let Paul win. BANG! The race started and it was Paul then Larry! Then Paul! Larry! Paul! Then larry won. Paul at this point furious went to the winners circle. He talked to Larry "Larry why didn't you let me win for the third time!? This is just your ego trying to win every time now!?" I didn't want them to fight so I chimed in "Larry, Paul! Please don't fight! Your two peas in a pod! Closer then bread in a basket! Your best friends!! You don't want to fight like this!" Larry turned to Paul and said "Hey look! A talking dog!"

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?' The horse says "I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer."

Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

Two blondes walk into a bar, but they are then puzzled as the door would not budge open for them.

hello

What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

knock knock knock knock ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

Whats black and gay? Obama

Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

What do we want? Equal rights for people with Tourette's Syndrome. When do we want them? Fuck!

25

what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

How do you call two black men on the moon? Astronauts.

What's worse than HIV? AIDS -Bob Bobby

Why was the black man arrested? Tax evasion.

What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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