Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

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Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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Who wants water? I do.

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whats worse then finding your mom with your boyfriend? finding your dad with your girlfriend.

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SCENE: A prirate walks into a bar with the wheel of the ship attached to his pants. BARTENDER: Doesn't that hurt? PIRATE: Aye! It drives me nuts.

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how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

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What the hell are you doing?

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

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Barack Obama.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a penis

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

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What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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richard is fag

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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