How much is that doggy in the window? It's not for sale....it's waiting to be euthanized.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Rishi has popcorn while wass n jess r making jokes on anti jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -21

this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A fat cat sits on the ground staring up at a fence. The fence stares down at the cat and laughs.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did one bean say to the other bean??? hows it been.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: knok knok A: Im home

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man is driving and hits a woman. Who's fault is it? The man's: pedestrians always have the right of way.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops