What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

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Nick Cannon

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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Why did the man drive into the river? He was sleep deprived from working overtime.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

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Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally, she has no arms.

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms.

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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Q

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A man says to another man, "Why the long face?" He then replies, "I have an elongated face, hands, and feet due to acromegaly."

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

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Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

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Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.....

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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Why was the Jewish boy afraid of an oven? The last oven malfunctioned and killed his father.

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If an asian man is really angry with a jewish man named gabriel what does he say? Gabriel I am angry with you

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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